The Eyes That Saved Me
by iwillalwayslovebechloe
Summary: Chloe and Beca seem to have an unspoken connection and the red headed girl sets her mind on finding her to make her join the Barden Bellas. But Beca has a secret that is discovered by the red head. What will happen with their friendship relationship...? Trigger Warning: Self Harm, Suicide Attempt (Bechloe)
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

 _The tears slowly made their way out of her eyes and down her cheeks, and she looked at herself in the mirror and said, "Nobody wants you, why be in a world that no one wants you in?" She looked over at where her roommate keeps her medication to help her sleep and remembers that she had some booze left over from a party..._

Beca made her way up the elevator to move her things into her new dorm room and meet her new roommate. When she got into the room she saw that her roommate was Asian and prayed that she spoke any kind of English. After setting up her side of the room she spoke to her now glaring roommate, "Hi, my name is Beca." When she didn't get a response she spoke again, "Sorry. Ummmm... Do you speak any English?... Or just tell me where your at with English" And just when she thought she was going to get the name of her roommate her dad walked in.

"Hey Beca! When did you get here? How did you get here?" She chose to ignore the first question and answered his second question. "Took a cab. Didn't want to inconvenience you and Shelia." She had a bit more attitude in her voice when she said _Sheila._ She _hated_ her step-mom. She's the one who took part in ripping apart her life at a young age. You see, Beca lived what she thought was a normal life, but soon realized that her parents yelling at each other every night wasn't normal. All the sudden her dad disappeared with a woman named Sheila and only spoke to her twice a month over the phone. So yeah you can say she wasn't the biggest fan of her.

Her roommate sighed loudly which brought her dads attention on her. "Hi, I'm Beca's dad, you must be her roommate." Her roommate spoke up in a monotone voice, "Yep that's me, the roommate. I'm Kimmy Jin." And with that she stood up and told Beca and her dad that she was going to go to the activities fair. Beca jumped at that idea just so she wouldn't have to talk to her dad, but just as she was going to walk out of her room her dad stopped her.

"Beca we need to talk."

Beca instantly knew what he was talking about, but decided to play dumb and not understand where he was going with the conversation. "What is there to talk about?" Her dad seemed to look at her and then at her laptop with her music mixing program still open and waiting to be used.

"Come on Beca you know what I'm talking about. You need to start being more serious about your future. This DJing thing isn't a profession its more like a hobby." And there it was. What she was trying to avoid.

"I'm not trying to be a DJ dad. I want to pursue a career in music, I want to be a music producer and college is only holding me back." She hated that her dad didn't understand what she wanted he only cared that she do what he wants and she is sick of it.

"Beca you do now your getting a free college tuition right? Why not take the opportunity to use college as an experience and see if you want to pursue something else more realistic." The fact that he put down her dream to be unrealistic pushed her over the edge and she just left the conversation and followed Kimmy Jin to the activities fair.

She walked around aimlessly for awhile deciding if she should actually join a club, then thought of how much time that would take away from her mixing and decided not to join a club. She continued to walk around anyways because she wasn't going to go back to her room and risk having to continue that conversation with her dad. When walking around she saw some weird things like deaf Jew club, the swim team that looked like they were wearing the bear minimum, and a few acapella groups that looked either stoned or too testosterone filled for her taste. When she began to become more bored by the second she was stopped when a flyer was shoved in her face by a red headed girl. The red head introduced herself as Chloe and Beca was immediately drawn to her and she didn't know why. Before Beca could get a word out a tall blonde chick that was standing next to Chloe stepped in front of her and asked to talk to Chloe privately for a quick second.

Beca swore she heard that blonde girl criticizing what Beca was wearing and her suspicions were confirmed when blondie turned around and glared at her. After their little conversation Chloe stared at Beca for what she thought was longer than necessary but then began to talk. "Do you want to join our acapella group? Its tons of fun and we sing cover songs without any instruments! Its all from our mouths." She was super bubbly and seemed to be really passionate about acapella but Beca didn't really have that much of an interest in acapella, she had more of an interest in Chloe. Her eyes were a startling blue and seemed to hypnotize Beca. She then thought she should stop staring and answer her.

\- Chloe's POV -

Her and Aubrey thought they were never going to get any members by just standing idly by their both so she decided to take action. She saw a small brunette girl that had a rock like fashion sense and that intrigued her. She stepped in front of the girl and explained that they were an all girl acapella group. She couldn't seem to take her eyes off of the smaller girl and she didn't know why, she just had this feeling in her stomach. Just as she was going to explain a little more Aubrey stepped in front of the small brunette taking Chloe's view away and asked if she could talk to her.

"I know we are desperate for members but her? She just looks... too alternative for us" Aubrey then turned around and looked at the now scowling brunette.

"I think she looks fine for us and she looks like she can sing, plus she definitely has a bikini ready body." She noticed that she was staring at the small girl again but biting her lip at the same time.

"You better be right because I can already tell me and this girl are going to butt heads." With that she had Aubrey step aside so she could talk to the girl again and quickly realized that the girl was starting to stare. Just when she was about to speak again the girl shook her head seeming to snap out of some sort of trance and told her that she doesn't even sing. And with that she was gone. Chloe hoped she could run into her again because she wanted to see more of that girl and get to know her. Aubrey looked at her with confusion and asked, "What are you doing? Why are you smiling? We just lost another person we could have had on the team and your smiling?" That snapped Chloe out of her day dreaming and started to make a plan to find that girl.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

\- Chloe's POV -

She felt like she had been searching for that small brunette forever! It's been about 2 weeks since she's seen the girl and doesn't even know her name thanks to Aubrey cutting her off in the middle of the conversation they were having. She's asked around if anyone has seen her and she got one vague response from a Korean girl named Kimmy Jin. Kimmy Jin said that she was a loner and had no friends which made Chloe sad and even more determined to find her just so they could be friends...or maybe something more.

Who was she kidding? Why was she even looking for this girl so intensely? Did she like this girl? No, they've never even really talked She decided to give it a rest for the day and started walking back to her and Aubrey's dorm. On her walk through the quad she was only looking down and getting lost in thought. All of the sudden she was slammed to the side by someone running. She went to turn around to yell at this rude person, but as she did she noticed the dark brown hair and the small figure. She started to call out to her but of course since she didn't know her name it wasn't very useful. Instead she put her running speed to max tryin to catch up with the girl, 'How is this girl so fast? She's so small!' she thought. Finally she reached her when the girl was starting to slow. "Wow your quick!" She said half out of breath. The girl turned to see who was talking and stopped her movements immediately. Chloe noticed that her mascara was smudged, eyes puffy, and it looked like she had a bruise forming on her arm.

\- Beca's POV -

She had just arrived at her dad's house and rang the doorbell and her stepmonster _Sheila_ opened the door. "Beca what are _you_ doing here?" She asked with annoyance present in her voice. Beca told her that her dad had invited her over for dinner so they could all talk, as much as she didn't want to talk with Sheila in the room she knew she had to in order to get what she wanted. Her dad got home about 10 min after Beca first arrived and greeted her.

They set the table for dinner together and started to talk about Beca's dream to become a music producer and moving to LA. "Dad I really _really_ want to move to LA and become a music producer, I've been dreaming about it for years now."

"I know Beca but you she get a college education first just incase you change your mind on what you want to do for a profession." Sheila rudely interrupted the conversation she was having with her father and put in what she thought of Beca's dream. "Your not even good enough to do any of that shit, nobody is gonna notice you because your a nobody. Why are you even trying to get there if your never gonna make it in the big leagues anyway?" Beca felt tears starting to form in her eyes when her father only looked at Sheila and then back at his food, not even bothering to defend his own daughter. Beca looked at her food then at her dad and got up and left her father's house.

She was just so angry at him and Sheila but what Sheila said has always been in the back of her mind. "What if she's right?" She said to herself. ' _She is right stupid. Get it? Nobody care about you or your music. Why do you continue to try?'_ The voices in her head start to become too much for her to endure. She started running, sprinting if she was being honest. She wanted to feel something to get rid of the voices that wouldn't go away. She saw a tree and decided to swing her arm so forcefully at the trunk until she was satisfied that the pain was enough. She wished she was back in her dorm, at least then she could've used her razor.

She began to sprint again when the pain in her arm had subsided and needed to focus on anything. The voices were back. ' _You think you can just run away from us? Ha! It's not that easy little girl. Your just a worthless little nobody. Why don't you just end it already? No one is going to miss you. If anything your roommate would be happy to have the room to herself.'_ She began to feel the tears start to slip out of her eyes and roll down her cheeks, but that didn't stop her from running. She even ran into someone and acted like it never happened and continued running. She heard someone yelling but ignored it until it stopped. Beca was nearing Baker hall where her dorm was and began to slow down to a walk. Not even 5 seconds had passed when she heard someone next to her say, "Wow your quick!"

Beca had recognized that voice from somewhere. She looked up quickly to see who it was. When she did so she was met with two bright blue eyes and fiery red hair. She stopped dead in her tracks because she looked to pretty. She was stuck in that position until the girl spoke. "Hey, it's me Chloe! Remember the activities fair? Acapella group?" Beca had just registered what Chloe had said. "Oh yeah! Chloe yeah I remember you."

"Yeah I never got your name though" Chloe said with a wink. Beca was confused at this wink, 'Why was she winking at me?' she thought.

"Oh right yeah sorry, it's Beca." She noticed that Chloe had started to look at the arm she had smashed into a tree and pulled it behind her in one swift motion. Which didn't go unnoticed by the red head. "What happened to your arm Beca?" she asked. 'Shit. Come up with an excuse quick!' she thought. Beca told her it must've been when she ran into someone back on the quad. She really just wanted Chloe to drop the subject so she could go to her dorm. She remembered the whole reason why she wanted to go there and got more antsy. She mumbled a quick excuse to Chloe and ran up to her room not even caring about what the red head was going to say to her.

 **That's it for this chapter guys! I hope your liking the story so far and I'm open to any suggestions you have. Thanks for reading! Till next time.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

 **Warning: Self Harm**

Beca got to her dorm room in a rush. She couldn't tell if Chloe had asked where she was going but she didn't care all she cared about was getting her razor and then her release. She burst through the door silently thanking the fact that her roommate Kimmy Jin wasn't there. She grabbed her razor and put it into her shower kit and headed down to the dorm showers. To say that she rushed to the dorm showers was an understatement, she basically was running down the hallways not bothering to look up and see all the confused faces she was passing. She got to the showers and automatically assumed that it was empty considering that there wasn't any water running. She ran into the first stall she saw and put all of her things down and closed her eyes trying to slow her breathing. The moment she started thing about the release she would get from the razor slashing against her skin her breathing evened out and she opened her eyes and a sense of calm come over her.

\- Chloe's POV -

After a rather odd encounter with the small girl who's name she learned was Beca she thought that she should probably shower after all the running around she did. Chloe went back to her dorm and saw that her roommate Aubrey was there. Aubrey asked her if she had any luck finding the girl. Chloe responded with an excited yes and told her about the off encounter with Beca. Aubrey only shrugged she shoulders and said that she knew that Beca was weird to begin with. After the brief conversation with Aubrey she grabbed her showering things and ran off telling Aubrey should would be back in a half hour.

She got to the showers and noticed that it was pretty quiet except for the one shower running. Chloe noticed that it was pretty late and realized that not many people shower this late. She began her shower and starting singing her favorite song, Titanium.

\- Beca's POV -

Beca had just started her shower and was taking out her razor when she heard the door to the showers open. First she tensed and was silently deciding whether she should leave or not, then decided she would stay but would keep quiet so not to draw attention to herself. Again she looked at her trusty razor that has been her bestfriend for the past few years, then she looked at her wrists and hips seeing the damage she's done over the years. She took a deep breath and pressed the razor to her wrist and slid it across watching the blood flow freely out of her wrist. She thought she heard someone singing in the background but it was interrupted by the voices. ' _Nobody wants you. Nobody cares about you. Why try anymore? Why don't you just end it already?'_ She took the razor again and sliced deep into her hip, deeper than she's ever gone before and a slight noise of pain escaped her mouth. At first she was reveling in the bliss that the pain brought, but was then a bit scared when she realized how much blood there was and how deep the cut was. She heard someone gasp and then her shower curtain flew open...

\- Chloe's POV -

She was happily singing Titanium loud and proud not having a care in the world that there was another person showering next to her in the next stall over. She closed her eyes to wash the shampoo out of her hair and she swore she heard someone make a noise and not a pleasant noise, it sounded like a whimper of pain. Once all of the shampoo was out of her hair se opened her eyes and looked down seeing red. _A lot_ of red. She gasped, the red she was seeing was blood and too much for someone to be on their period. She became very worried and saw that it was coming from the stall next to hers. Without a second thought she ran out of her stall and barged into her neighbors and both of them were completely naked. The first thing she saw was Beca, Beca and the silver glimmer in her hand and the cut on her wrist and an even deeper one on her hip. "Beca...?" She whispered...

\- Beca's POV -

Her shower curtain was flung open to reveal a very naked Chloe staring at a very naked Beca. "Beca...?" she heard. Beca realized she still had her razor in her hand and two gushing wounds one on her wrist, and one on her hip, the hip being much more severe. She started to try and hide herself from Chloe but was soon slapped in the face of reality when there was nothing to hide in. Chloe spoke up again, "Beca, lets put down whatever is in your hand and talk about this." Beca thought, 'Does she realize that their both butt ass naked?' She guessed that wasn't Chloe's main concern right now.

"There's nothing to talk about, leave me alone and get out of my stall!" Beca shouted and realized she sounded very harsh towards the other girl.

"Beca I want to help, let me help you... please. It doesn't have to be like this" Chloe was seemingly desperate now.

Beca shut off the water and Chloe had tossed her, her towel allowing her to cover herself. Chloe then quickly went to her stall next to Beca's and covered herself as well. "Let me help you clean up those cuts Beca," "You can come to my dorm and we can talk about this." Beca started to feel her tears brim with tears dangerously close to spilling over. She only nodded in defeat of Chloe's pleading.

\- Chloe's POV -

Chloe had pleaded with Beca for her to let her help the younger girl and when she finally agreed Chloe helped stop most of the bleeding on Beca's wrist and hip. Beca seemed to be immune to the pain because she didn't once wince or make a face when Chloe pressed into the wounds with a towel. Beca's face was slack and she looked as if she was numb. Chloe quickly sent a text to Aubrey letting her know that she was bringing Beca to their dorm.

 **Chloe: On my way back and I'm bringing Beca.**

 _ **Aubrey: Why are you bringing that alternative freak back to our dorm? Doesn't she have her own dorm to go to?**_

 **Chloe: This is a special circumstance. Please understand Aubrey its important.**

 _ **Aubrey: Ughh. fine.**_

 **Chloe: K. Be there in 5.**

 **AUTHORS NOTE:**

 **It's getting a bit more intense and I'm hoping I'm capturing things well enough. I hope your enjoying this so far. Don't be afraid to leave a review! I love seeing you guys' feedback!**


	4. Chapter 4

**AN/ Sorry I've been gone for a while guys. School break ended and then life got hectic again from all the school work. I'll try to update more often. Please don't hate me...**

\- Beca's POV -

They had just arrived in Chloe and this blonde chicks apartment and Beca started to get really angry at herself. ' _Look what you did. You couldn't help but let someone see you and now they have to take care of you'_ She shook her head attempting to get rid of the voices that never seem to go away. The blonde girl whos name she learned to be Aubrey was giving a serious glare in her direction, then looked at Chloe. "Chloe can I talk to you for a second?" Her voice sounding clipped. She heard Chloe sigh, "Yeah sure Bree." She could hear them pretty clearly considering they were only 10 feet away and around the corner.

"Chlo, why is she here? And why were you so persistent on bringing her here? Do you have a toner for her?!"

"Bree I brought her here because she needs someone. She needs help, I saw her in the shower a-"

"You bombarded her in the showers?! Chloe that's disgus-"

"YES I BOMBARDED HER BREE! I saw blood coming from her stall and I knew it wasn't someone on a heavy flow so I went in and checked and sure enough there she was, her wrists bleeding!"

"Omg, Chloe I'm sorry I assumed. Is she okay? Is she gonna try anything?"

"I don't know Bree but that's why I brought her here."

"Okay she can stay in the guest bedroom"

Beca heard them stop talking and guessed they were walking back over towards her. Chloe bent down in front of her and looked up at her. Beca couldn't help but stare into those extremely blue eyes, they made her lose herself and she momentarily forgot where she was and what shit she had going on in her mind. She felt safe with this girl and she didn't know why.

\- Chloe's POV -

After her and Aubrey's discussion on why she brought the small girl there she went over to talk to Beca and tell her that she was gonna sleep in the guest bedroom they had. She bent down in front of the younger girl and looked at her for a minute. She looked like she was scared and timid around everything she looked vulnerable. But she really couldn't help but notice the girls eyes, they were a nice blue, like hers but a darker blue like the color of the sea. She pulled herself out of the daze for a moment and told Beca, "I uh, I know you don't really know me but you trusted me enough to bring you here. I'd like it a lot if you'd stay here for the night in the guest bedroom. I'd also like it if you'd allow me to clean up your wrists if that's okay?" She only got a small hesitant nod from the girl and took her hand gently and led her towards the bathroom.

Beca sat on the top of the toilet seat while Chloe grabbed the first aid kit that they kept in their apartment just in case. She took out the peroxide and some gauze with some colorful wrap that acted like a tape at the same time. She looked at the way Beca was sitting, She was hunched and seemed to try and distance herself from Chloe. She slowly walked towards Beca and sat down in front of her motioning for her to giver her, her wrists so she could clean them. She took a bucket from under the sink so she wouldn't make a mess with the peroxide. "Beca this is peroxide and is gonna clean out what ever bacteria that may have gotten into those cuts. Then I'm gonna wrap them up with this." Beca slowly and hesitantly gave Chloe her arm to clean. She took the car off of the peroxide and poured a little bit directly into the cut. Beca winced slightly when the cut started to bubble up. She quickly cleaned away the rest of the peroxide and put some gauze onto the cut then wrapping it with the prewrap type stuff. "If this is too tight let me know and I'll loosen it." She said. "It's fine. Thank you." She finished up the other wrist and led Beca to the room she was staying in. "Hold on, I'll go grab you something to wear to sleep in." She ran to her room grabbing the smallest shorts and t-shirt she had and brought them to Beca. "Here, I think these will fit you. They're kinda small on me so it should fit." She left the room with a small goodnight to the girl and gently shut the door to go to her own bed.

\- Beca's POV -

Chloe had cleaned her cuts for her without blinking or making a face at the horrible thing she did to herself. She didn't know why she let Chloe clean them for her cause she's done it plenty of times before without anyone's help. She heard just how softly and sweet that Chloe was speaking to her and it made her feel like it was safe to she her vulnerable side to her. Beca got dressed in the clothes that Chloe had brought her to sleep in which fit better than she expected and hopped into the bed. The bed was soft and very comfy compared to her dorm room bed. She was exhausted from the adrenaline that comes with cutting yourself and the amount of pain that was coming from her wrist had kept that said adrenaline going until Chloe soothed it with her delicate touch. Beca closed her eyes and fell asleep while thinking of the red head that seemed to be someone that Beca couldn't understand why she felt safe around.

 **AN/ sorry I know its a short chapter and you guys deserve better for the amount of time I left this story. I'm just busy with life and school and my mind is kinda always going downhill, but seeing your guys' reviews makes the time and effort I put into this story worth it. :) Leave a review if you'd like I would appreciate it.**


	5. Chapter 5

\- Beca's POV -

Beca woke up and looked out the window and guessed that it was really early considering the little amount of light coming through the window. She felt strange sleeping in another person's house and in their bed let alone someone who she just barely met. She didn't want to get out of bed but she did need to pee really bad. Beca got up out of the bed and searched around the dark room for the door. When she opened the door it was dead silent besides the loud squeak from the door opening. She cringed at how loud the door was not wanting to wake the other two girls that are just down the hall. After carefully tip toeing down the hall and into the bathroom she finally did her business and washed her hands. Not seeing a towel to dry her hands she shook them out. Not realizing that she got water on the floor she went to walk out of the bathroom and slid right into the door, the minute she fell she used her hands to catch herself and felt the cuts on her wrist immediately open. She started to scream in pain but them slapped her hand on her mouth to muffle it. She cursed herself knowing that she woe up someone when she heard footsteps coming towards the bathroom.

\- Chloe's POV -

Chloe was sleeping peacefully until she heard a scream but only briefly then it was muffled. She immediately looked to her left to see if Aubrey was still there. She let out a sigh of relief, but then remembered that there was another in the house, emBeca. /emChloe jumped out of bed and ran down the hall trying to find where Beca was. She reached the guest bedroom to find it empty and looked around the house until she heard a sharp intake of breath come from the bathroom. She knocked on the door, "Beca you in there? Are you okay I heard a scream." She heard a small voice call and say, "I...I'm okay I just slipped and fell" Chloe could tell that Beca was crying. She tried opening the door to find that it was locked.

"Beca open the door please. I need to see that your okay."

"I-I don't want you to see. You've dealt with me enough you don't need to deal with this."

"Please Beca, I just wanna help you. You aren't bothering me at all and I want to make sure your safe." She heard the door click signaling that Beca had unlocked the door. Chloe walked in to find Beca sitting on the edge of the bathtub holding a giant wad of toilet paper to her wrists. "BECA, Oh my god what happened?!" Beca seemed to wince at the loud tone Chloe was using which didn't go unnoticed to Chloe. She put her focus on Beca and noticed that Beca's wrists were re-opened and it looked painful and made Chloe internally wince at the sight.

\- Beca's POV -

Once she had let Chloe in to see the mess that she had made she felt ashamed and only looked down at the ground while she was holding the giant wads of toilet paper to her now bleeding wrists. She heard Chloe yell and she flinched at how loud she was saying things which she noticed made Chloe frown for a slight second. She made eye contact with the taller girl and the tears she didn't know she was holding spilled out silently. Chloe only walked up to her slowly and crouched in front of her and wiped the tears away and waited until Beca opened her eyes again. When she opened her eyes she was met with those beautiful blue eyes that belonged to the caring girl in front of her.

"Let me help you clean those up and I'll wrap them like I did last night" Chloe said. Beca only nodded in response unable to form words after being lost in those blue eyes. She once again felt the familiar sting that came with peroxide and then felt Chloe's light touch holding her hand. At first Beca didn't know what she was doing but then realized that she was holding Chloe's hand and Chloe had stopped cleaning her wrists. She looked up and was met with Chloe's intense stare. "Beca, I know you don't know me that well and I don't know you that well, but I already really care about you." Beca was stunned for a moment but then replied within an instant "I think I know what you mean. I think I'm starting to feel the same way."/p

\- Chloe's POV -

Chloe ad never been more happy when Beca had actually responded to her after she told her how she felt. It was like the world had stopped and she wasn't focused on anything except the other girls eyes and lips. But she quickly remembered that she still needed to finish wrapping Beca's wrists. She gave Beca a big smile and continued to grab the gauze and wrap up her wrists. When she was done she took the time to place a gentle kiss on each wrists. Beca looked completely stunned for a minute before her eyes seemed to well up with a fresh set of tears. "Thank you Chloe. I've never had someone as understanding in my life about stuff like this. People always assumed that I cut myself for attention."

"I know that someone as beautiful as you would never do this for attention. I don't know the reason why you've done this, but I do know that when your ready you'll tell me." It was that moment when the conversation stopped and they stared at each other's lips and slowly started getting closer. Chloe felt Beca's breath on her lips and was wondering how soft the other girls lips would be on hers, how they would mold together as one. Just as their lips were about to touch they heard Aubrey's sleep laced voice. "Hey, Chloe where'd you go? It's like 5 in the morning what are you doing?"

 **AN: Sorry guys! I don't know why it did that to my writing but it's fixed now**


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